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November 24, 2001-8:02 p.m. The things one must contend with as a resident of Texas! Did anyone see the horror that was the half-time show at the Cowboy game on Thursday? It�s not like the game itself wasn�t horrific enough. I�ve suggested that the Cowboys adopt the Twelfth-Man rule of Texas A & M. Every week they could just grab another fan out of the stands and make them the quarterback. I�m sure that would probably be a way of not only improving the quality of the team but also of boosting attendance at the games. Jerry Jones could save more of his money for strippers that way, too. Anyway, back to the half-time show. It sort of reminded me of those cheesy Olympics opening ceremonies. They had the band Creed performing. I�ve heard of them but I�m not a fan by any stretch of the imagination. They also had these�for want of a better word�acrobats. They were shirtless guys in baggy genie pants and they climbed these strips of fabric that were suspended from the roof of the stadium reminiscent of knotted sheets used by teenagers to escape their second story bedrooms on sitcoms. They twirled around on these sheets and did some more neat tricks that I�ve evidently blocked from my memory. Also in attendance were these red people, in a cheap rip off of the Blue Man Group, dressed in what I can only describe as dresses with a skirt with a hooped hem falling from the waist and another rising from the waist. They sort of resembled Calla Lilies with their red heads in the center of the white skirt-things. The Cowboy cheerleaders were there, too, of course. Some of them handed doves to children to release during the show. There was also an African American boys choir. Shots of the half-time show were interspersed with scenes from the September 11th tragedies. How they ever came to the conclusion that this mess was a coherent whole, I�ll never know! As if this debacle wasn�t a significant enough blow against Texans, yesterday a man at the DFW airport shot a hole through a window when he attempted to show the airport staff that his rifle was not loaded and should be checked with his luggage. Luckily, no one was injured in this incident and no charges were filed. I would have thought the man would have checked his weapon before he left the house, but that�s probably just me. So. Yeah. They�re making it tough to be a Texan these days. **Disclaimer: All characters in this diary are fictional. Any resemblance to actual people living or dead, real or imagined, is purely coincidental and unintentional.** |
