October 19, 2004-5:12 a.m.

I am going to the doctor today for a follow up on my cholesterol and I have to say if it's not any better, I may scream.

I've spent the last three months eating oats and nuts, fat free salad dressings and all manner of heart-healthy shite.

It would really, really test my belief in the fairness of the universe if my stupid cholesterol isn't down some and I've been subsisting on a diet of cardboard cuisine for nothing.

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